Mary is a life-long member of the Episcopal Church. She served for many years on the ECW Board in Delaware.
She has served many years in her local parish, St. Mary’s, Bridgeville, DE.
Dottie is a cradle Episcopalian and has been involved in many aspects of the church.
She has served as Vice President of Province III for three years, Province III Representative to the National Board of Episcopal Church Women for three years and was a member of the Province III ECW for 16 years and served on the nomination committee several times.
Dottie was a delegate to the Maryland Diocesan Convention for 10 years, served on the vestry for three 3-year terms and for 25 years was in the choir, served on the Altar Guild and was a reader and chalice server. Besides her involvement in the church, she is a wife, mother, grandmother and an active member in the community.
Alyce has been a member of St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church in York, Pennsylvania since her teenage years.
She married her husband Don in 1972 at St. Andrews. She enjoys singing in the choir and has long been a member of the Altar Guild.
She has made various full sets of vestments for the church as well as altar linens. At a Diocesan ECW Annual Meeting we presented a stole that was designed by the board and sewn by Alyce to the 11th Bishop of the Diocese of Central Pennsylvania, Audrey Candy Scalan.
Joanne Hutchison is a life-long Episcopalian and currently a member of Holy Trinity, Wenonah, in the Diocese of New Jersey. At Holy Trinity, Joanne is the directress of the Altar Guild.
She uses her talents as a seamstress to adorn the church with hand-sewn frontals and vestments. Joanne’s artistic vision and leadership have assisted her in leading the floral committee, and she decorates the church with beautiful flowers, often from her own gardens, during Christmas, Holy Week, Easter and other special occasions.
Joanne has received the Jubilee Ministry, Kitchen of Hope Community Service Award, and is active in several service organizations. She has served as the outstanding Secretary of the Diocesan ECW Board and also served on the Diocesan Altar Guild Board. She is married to Gerald, her husband of 54 years, has two daughters and three grandchildren. She is moved always by her love of God and her church.
Vernese became a member of St. David’s Episcopal Church in the Diocese of Long Island in 1997. She served the church in many key positions. Her former priest had this to say about her, “her service was accomplished with distinction.” For this she received the Bishop’s Cross. Vernese often reminds other sometimes discouraged ECW members that “when we do God’s work, we do it willingly.”
Vernese’s invitation to one 18-year-old member of the parish to attend an ECW meeting resulted in gaining 10 other new members from this group – an opportunity for these young people to see ECW at work.
She continues the work of building God’s kingdom without giving it a second thought. Because of her service to ECW and the church near and far, we are pleased to honor Vernese Smith as the Distinguished Woman from the Diocese of Long Island.
I began working for the Episcopal Church in 1994 as a Parish Administrator of one of the Diocese of Rhode Island’s larger churches, St. John’s in Barrington.
It was my first entry into the Episcopal Church, having been raised a Roman Catholic. After 13 years, I became the Executive Assistant to the Bishop, the Right Rev. Geralyn Wolf for 5 years. Upon her retirement I served the Rt. Rev. W. Nicholas Knisley, remaining in that position until my retirement December 31, 2021.
I was blessed to have found this ministry in both my parish and the bishop’s office. Passionate about outreach and co-founder of Beyond Our Walls, a volunteer organization focused on a yearly Great Day of Service, uniting hundreds of volunteers to serve a variety of organizations in need, I also was instrumental in growing Loaves and Fishes, R.I., a mobile feeding ministry.
In my retirement I await that next outreach adventure. I married an Episcopal priest, the Rev. John Higginbotham, in November of 2020, have two adult children, 3 adult step-children and one step-grandson. I am humbled and grateful to receive this honor from the Episcopal Church Women.
Valzie is a member of St. John’s Parish in Bridgeport. She has been a Sunday School Teacher and also elected to positions of leadership, serving as both Junior and Senior Warden.
She has served on the finance committee, worship committee and is a Liturgical Assistant. Valzie has served on the ECW Board of the Episcopal Church Women as the treasurer, Triennial delegate and both 2nd and 1st Vice President.
She was the Diocesan President 2012-2018, served on the CT BDEC Mission Council for the diocese and as sub-dean of the Bridgeport Deanery. On the Province level she served as Vice President. In the community she served as president of the Bridgeport Industrial Management Club, the West Indian American Association and the Bridgeport Council of Churches as recording secretary.
Valzie is married to Vinton Peterkin, is the mother of two, guardian of three and grandmother of four.
This workshop is designed to give a face to Alzheimer’s disease from the caregiver’s and care recipient’s perspective. Participants will learn the importance of mind, body, spirit and the arts, how to find resources ad create a support system. The leader of this workshop has written a trilogy of her experience caring for her husband over the course of 9 years.
*Attendance is limited to the first 100 persons who log into the Zoom workshop.
*This Zoom workshop will be video and audio recorded and hosted on the NECW YouTube channel.
Marjorie Burke grew up in Watertown, Massachusetts, and moved to Lexington when she married her husband, Donald; they raised their two sons there. She is a graduate of the Massachusetts College of Pharmacy and Health Sciences University and worked as a staff pharmacist at Children’s Hospital in Boston for a number of years, followed by substituting in many other Boston hospitals.
Marjorie has always been active in the Episcopal Church at all levels—parish, diocese, and national. She served as national president of the Episcopal Church Women and coedited Women’s Uncommon Prayers: Our Lives Revealed, Nurtured, Celebrated. Her poetry and prose have been published in literary magazines and local newspapers. She and her husband, together, wrote Melting Ice ~ Shifting Sand, which chronicled the first six years of his struggle with Alzheimer’s disease. She completed the trilogy with Pilgrimage on Ice and Sand, and Beyond Ice and Sand. When Will Someday Come is a collection of poems and meditations she wrote on grieving and living again.
Currently, Marjorie lives in Weare, New Hampshire, where she has just completed sixteen years on the Weare District School Board, five of them as chair. Her beloved husband, Donald, died in September 2018. Marjorie has been a weaver and a liturgical dancer in the past and likes to garden and cook.
List your warning signs of stress.
Genova, Lisa. Still Alice. Gallery Books, 2007. – The story of a woman suffering from early onset Alzheimer’s disease. Made into an award-winning movie starring Julianne Moore.
Angelica, Jade C. Where Two Worlds Touch: A Spiritual Journey Through Alzheimer’s. Skinner House, 2014. – An ordained minister shares the story of her mother’s decline with Alzheimer’s disease; both a spiritual memoir and a pastoral guide.
Buchman, Sunny, with Paul Buchman. Precious Window of Time: Our Journey with Alzheimer’s. Author House, 2011. – The story of the author’s husband’s Alzheimer’s disease and how she made each moment left to them precious and meaningful.
Comer, Meryl. Slow Dancing with a Stranger: Lost and Found in the Age of Alzheimer’s. Harper One, 2014. – A deeply personal memoir of how one woman dealt with her husband’s Alzheimer’s disease.
Cooney, Eleanor. Death in Slow Motion: A Memoir of a Daughter, Her Mother, and the Beast Called Alzheimer’s. HarperCollins, 2003. – A story of how both mother and daughter face the realities of living with Alzheimer’s that is both poignant and humorous.
Davis, Robert. My Journey into Alzheimer’s Disease: A True Story: Helpful Insights for Family and Friends. Tyndale House, 1989. – A pastor’s personal journey with Alzheimer’s disease.
Gross, Jane. A Bittersweet Season: Caring for Our Aging Parents—and Ourselves. Alfred A. Knopf, 2011. – A moving story of a former New York Times reporter’s challenges finding appropriate care for her aging mother suffering from dementia. Combines personal narrative with practical advice.
Hoblitzelle, Olivia Ames. The Majesty of Your Loving. Green Mountain Books, 2008; republished as Ten Thousand Joys and Ten Thousand Sorrows: A Couple’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s. Tarcher Penguin, 2010. – A story of love and courage as the author’s husband Alzheimer’s disease progresses. Each chapter ends with suggestions, reflections, and seed thoughts.
Kuster, Anne McLane, with Susan McLane. The Last Dance: Facing Alzheimer’s with Love and Laughter. Peter E. Randall, 2004. – A poignant and loving story of a dynamic woman as she slipped into the depths of Alzheimer’s disease, told by her daughter.
Matthews, Glenn, and Gail Matthews. Did I Die? Managing the Mayhem of Alzheimer’s: A Caregiver’s Guide to Peace and Quality of Life. Privately published, 2013. – How a couple dealt with Alzheimer’s disease.
Miller, Sue. The Story of My Father: A Memoir. Random House, 2003. – Beautifully written story of a father and daughter as they adjust to their changing roles when Alzheimer’s enters their lives.
Montgomery, Michelle. Alzheimer Diary: A Wife’s Journal. CreateSpace, 2010. – A nine-month journal of a wife dealing with her husband’s Alzheimer’s disease.
O’Brien, Greg. On Pluto: Inside the Mind of Alzheimer’s. Codfish Press, 2014. – The author’s own story of what it is like to live with Alzheimer’s disease.
Peterson, Barry. Jan’s Story: Love Lost to the Long Goodbye of Alzheimer’s. Behler Publications, 2010. – A husband’s poignant telling of his wife’s decent into Alzheimer’s disease.
Swenson, Harriet K. Around the House: One Woman Shares How Millions Care. Peter E. Randall, 2015. – Random daily thoughts for living captured as the author cares for her husband dying with cancer.
Whouley, Kate. Remembering the Music, Forgetting the Words: Travels with Mom in the Land of Dementia. Beacon Press, 2011. – Stories told with love and humor about the author’s caring for her mother suffering from Alzheimer’s.
Archer, Janet. An Invitation to Pause: Musings from a Mindfulness Teacher. Blue Bungalow, 2015. – Twenty-eight short stories inviting you to pause and take stock of the precious gifts in every moment.
Bays, Jan Chozen. How to Train a Wild Elephant, and Other Adventures in Mindfulness. Shambhala, 2011. – A year’s worth of mindfulness practices for living life more joyfully and fully.
Bell, Karen Whitley. Living at the End of Life: A Hospice Nurse Addresses the Most Common Questions. Sterling Ethos, 2010. – Answers from a hospice nurse to questions about dealing with the final months and days of life.
Bloom Michael. The Accidental Caregiver’s Survival Guide: Your Roadmap to Caregiving Without Regret. Bloom Coaching and Performance, 2013. – A wealth of practical tips to help caregivers deal with the roller-coaster journey of caring for an ill loved one.
Brackey, Jolene. Creating Moments of Joy: A Journal for Caregivers. 4th ed. Purdue University Press, 2008. – A collection of vignettes of people suffering from the many forms of dementia with tips for coping.
Cail, Mary M. The All-Weather Friend’s Guide to Alzheimer’s Disease: Staying Connected to Loved Ones with Dementia and Their Caregivers. True Wind, 2011. – A guide for friends and families who want to stay connected with people suffering from Alzheimer’s disease.
Callone, Patricia R., et al. A Caregiver’s Guide to Alzheimer’s Disease: 300 Tips for Making Life Easier. Demos Medical Publishing, 2006. – A guide filled with helpful tips and techniques to assist caregivers.
Cohen, Alan. A Daily Dose of Sanity: A Five-Minute Soul Recharge for Every Day of the Year. Hay House, 2010. – A must-read to begin each day with inspiring, poignant, and humorous stories.
Cohen, Alan A Deep Breath of Life: Daily Inspiration for Heart-Centered Living. Hay House, 1996. – Daily meditations that soak deeply into the beginning of your day.
Coste, Joanne Koenig. Learning to Speak Alzheimer’s: A Groundbreaking Approach for Everyone Dealing with the Disease. Houghton Mifflin, 2003. – The five tenets of the “habilitation” approach to support the independence and dignity of those suffering with Alzheimer’s disease.
Freitas, Joshua J. Dementia Concept. Blue Sail, 2015. – A caregiver’s guide to improving life for those with Alzheimer’s disease and related dementias.
Gawande, Atul. Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End. Metropolitan Books, 2014. – A doctor’s perspective on contemporary medicine and what matters at the end of life.
Gray-Davidson, Frena. The Alzheimer’s Sourcebook for Caregivers: A Practical Guide for Getting Through the Day. 3d ed. McGraw-Hill, 1999. – Practical tips for dealing with difficult behaviors, managing stress, and caring for yourself.
Hughes, Holly J., ed. Beyond Forgetting: Poetry and Prose About Alzheimer’s Disease. Kent State University Press, 2009. – Honest, deeply moving, and compassionate stories and poems by doctors, nurses, social workers, and family members whose lives have been touched by Alzheimer’s disease.
Jacobs, Barry J. The Emotional Survival Guide for Caregivers: Looking After Yourself and Your Family While Helping an Aging Parent. Guilford Press, 2006. – Tips for finding emotional support, drawing on spiritual resources, and making the most of the chaos that takes over caregivers’ lives.
Kind, Vicki. The Caregiver’s Path to Compassionate Decision Making: Making Choices for Those Who Can’t. Greenleaf Book Group Press, 2010. – Full of helpful suggestions for making decisions for loved ones no longer capable of making them on their own.
Kuhn, Daniel. Alzheimer’s Early Stages: First Steps for Families, Friends, and Caregivers. 3d ed. Hunter House, 2013. – A helpful guide for new caregivers in understanding the disease.
Lake, Nell. The Caregivers: A Support Group’s Stories of Slow Loss, Courage, and Love. Scribner, 2014. – Members of a support group share their stories affirming how essential it is for caregivers to have a support group.
London, Judith L. Connecting the Dots: Breakthroughs in Communication as Alzheimer’s Advances. New Harbinger, 2009. – Helpful suggestions and techniques for maintaining meaningful relationships with loved ones in middle or late stages of Alzheimer’s disease.
Lundberg, Gary, and Joy Lundberg. I Don’t Have to Make Everything All Better: Six Practical Principles to Empower Others to Solve Their Own Problems While Enriching Your Relationships. Viking Press, 1999. – A handbook providing tips on using validation in communication to help others help themselves.
McCullough, Dennis M. My Mother, Your Mother: Embracing “Slow Medicine,” the Compassionate Approach to Caring for Your Aging Loved Ones. Harper, 2008. – Sensitively written recommendation for a “slow medicine” of common sense and kindness for attending to the needs of the elderly and improving the quality of their late lives.
Mace, Nancy, and Peter Rabins. The 36-Hour Day: A Family Guide to Caring for People with Alzheimer’s Disease, Related Dementia, and Memory Loss. 5th ed. Johns Hopkins University Press, 2011. – Considered by many to be the Bible on Alzheimer’s disease, full of practical information. If you read only one book on caring for people with Alzheimer’s, this is the book to read.
Newmark, Amy, and Angela Timashenka Geiger. Chicken Soup for the Soul: Living with Alzheimer’s and Other Dementias. Chicken Soup for the Soul, 2014. – 101 stories of caregiving, coping, and compassion to provide support for all phases of the journey.
Peterson, Betsy. Voices of Alzheimer’s: Courage, Humor, Hope, and Love in the Face of Dementia. Da Capo Press, 2004. – A collection of short essays covering all aspects of dementia, including diagnosis, financial matters, medical issues, and final days.
Santulli, Robert B. The Alzheimer’s Family: Helping Caregivers Cope. W. W. Norton, 2011. – Helpful information for the entire family of unpaid caregivers learning how to cope when someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.
Sheehy, Gail. Passages in Caregiving: Turning Chaos into Confidence. William Morrow, 2010. – The author of Passages and other books on stages of life uses the metaphor of walking a labyrinth to outline the turns and new normals of caring for a loved one with a terminal illness.
Shenk, David. The Forgetting: Alzheimer’s, Portrait of an Epidemic. Doubleday, 2001. – A well-researched book that discusses the social, medical, and spiritual implications of dealing with Alzheimer’s.
Snyder, Lisa. Speaking Our Minds: What It’s Like to Have Alzheimer’s. Health Professions Press, 2009. – Stories of people living with Alzheimer’s disease, sharing both their pain and their courage.
Strauss, Claudia J. Talking to Alzheimer’s: Simple Ways to Connect When You Visit with a Family Member or Friend. New Harbinger Publications, 2002. – Helpful suggestions addressing situations that come up when visiting someone with Alzheimer’s that will make the time together pleasant and meaningful for everyone.
Swinton, John. Dementia: Living in the Memories of God. William B. Eerdmans, 2012. – The author, a pastoral theologian, helps readers consider dementia from the compassionate perspective of God, in which we do not lose our worth just because we lose some capabilities.
Tarach-Ritchey, Angil. Behind the Old Face: Aging in America and the Coming Elder Boom. Sculpt Media, 2012. – A unique solution to the debate surrounding the rising cost of caring for our elderly.
Zeisel, John. I’m Still Here: A New Philosophy of Alzheimer’s Care. Penguin Books, 2010. – Tips for developing meaningful communication, building relationships, and connecting through art, music, poetry, and film with people with Alzheimer’s disease.
Alive Inside: www.aliveinside.us (video about the Music & Memory program, which shows the importance of music for patients suffering from any form of dementia)
Alzheimer’s Association: www.alz.org
Alzheimer’s Store: www.alzstore.com
Powerful Tools for Caregivers: www.powerfultoolsforcaregivers.org
Second Wind: www.secondwind.org (information on a Virtual Dementia Tour, which lets caregivers experience what it is like to live with dementia)
Teepa Snow, dementia and Alzheimer’s care expert: www.teepasnow.com
Movies about Alzheimer’s Disease
Away from Her
Aurora Borealis
Firefly Dreams
Glen Campbell: I’ll Be Me
Iris (a memoir of Iris Murdoch)
The Memory Loss Tapes
The Savages
Still Alice
Google “Memory Café” and learn more about taking part in these gatherings. Find one in your area and attend. Both caregiver and care receiver can gain enormous benefits.
Search the Internet for caregivers’ support groups near you. Dementia is devastating for the entire family, and everyone affected by it needs support. The primary caregiver cannot provide the optimal care alone.
As a caregiver, develop your own self-care regime. Remember the words of the flight attendant before an airplane takes off: put your own oxygen mask on before you help your seatmate. If you don’t take care of yourself first, you will not be able to care for others.
Here are some self-care suggestions that have worked for me:
La Historia de “La Cocina de Primeras Naciones” ha tenido sus raíces en el ocaso de los años 90 por medio de la Reverenda Melanie Spears, su esposo George y su familia, y la congregación de “La Misión India de Todos Los Santos”. Durante este tiempo, las conferencias del “Camino Entrelazado” o “Path Crossing” fueron sostenidas. El “Camino Entrelazado” o “Path Crosssing” promovió la exploración de asociaciones Interculturales, uniendo así predominantemente a las congregaciones nativo-americanas con las congregaciones anglosajonas en los Estados Unidos.
A través del Reverendo Mark McDonald, una conexión fue hecha entre las Iglesias de “Todos Los Santos” y San Paul en Indianápolis. La Madre Melanie se esmeró en construir relaciones, tiospaye, comunidad, opuestas a asociaciones de intercambio. Los parroquianos de la iglesia de “Todos Los Santos” hospedaron a parroquianos de la iglesia de “San Paul” en sus casas. La invitación de la Madre Melanie fue, “Vengan y sean parte de nuestra familia.” Esta fue la temática a lo largo de la asociación que llevo a las personas de ambas iglesias, al igual que aquellos pertenecientes a las iglesias de “San Juan el bautista” y “La Catedral de San Marco” (ambas ubicadas en Minneapolis) a trabajar mancomunadamente, sin restricciones, en un proceso liderado por El Espíritu Santo para la renovación de la Iglesia.
Posteriormente, una pregunta resalto: “Que te gustaría hacer si tu pudieras poseer algo aquí?” La respuesta arribo: “Abrir una cocina que sirva sopa.” La necesidad de tener un programa de alimentación en la comunidad fue aparente. Con el pasar del tiempo, una cocina comercial fue construida, capacitando así el comienzo de tal ministerio. El espacio fue preparado de una manera magistral, y las semillas fueron plantadas. La Madre Melanie tuvo que jubilarse medicamente en el año 2000, lo cual hizo cesar los próximos pasos, pero en aquel entonces ella recuerda haber tenido “una visión de un hombre nativo viniendo a la iglesia…una persona que estaba supuesta a estar allí.”
Cuando el Reverendo Robert Dos Toros visitó y entrevisto en la iglesia de “Todos Los Santos” después, expreso sus esperanzas de que un ministerio de alimentación empezara y fuera sostenible. Esto se concatena con lo expresado por el Padre Robert al expresar: “Alimentar y dar de beber al hambriento y sediento, hospedar al forastero, son tanto un mandato del evangelio como una practica Lakota.” Mateo 25: 35-36 establece, “Porque tuve hambre, y me diste de comer, tuve sed y me diste de beber, fui un forastero y me hospedaste, estuve desnudo y me cobijaste, estuve enfermo y cuidaste de mí, estuve en prisión, y me visitaste.”
El Reverendo Robert Dos Toros aceptó el llamado a servir como el vicario de la iglesia de “Todos Los Santos” y el misionero para el departamento del Trabajo Indio en la Iglesia Episcopal en Minnesota o sus siglas en inglés (ECNM). Un plan detallado y cuidadoso se puso en marcha, y “La Cocina de las Primeras Naciones” o como lo indican sus siglas en inglés (FNK) empezó sirviendo el día de todos los santos, el 1 de noviembre de 2008. El Padre Robert ideo el nombre “La Cocina de Todas Las Naciones”, notando que vivimos cerca de la frontera con Canadá y el termino “Primeras Naciones” es usado para describir a los pueblos indígenas de Canadá. Estas palabras encapsulan el hecho de que los pueblos indígenas en los Estados Unidos también son oriundos de otras naciones y enfatiza las comidas que servimos: Orgánicas e indígenas.
Since the pandemic started back in 2020, the Communique’ editorial staff has witnessed as well as discussed what services local ECW groups provide that have the largest impact in their community. Food by no surprise continued to rise to the forefront of community needs.
Many of our groups rose to the need and focused on mask making and looking for ways to support those who were shutoff from their normal daily lives. We have seen the creation of sharing libraries stocked with books donated by church goers, technology support teams reach out to those who may need help with online-video meeting, and the reestablishment of the old-time telephone tree, but in the end, food drove the most basic requests.
It is by no accident that we dedicate this issue of the Communique’ to food. The lessons we learned in 2020 still chime with importance today. The Economic Research Service of the U.S. Department of Agriculture reports that in 2020, 10.5 percent of households were food insecure at least some time during the year, including 3.9 percent (5.1 million households) that had very low food security.
Food insecurity rates are highest for single mother households and households with incomes below poverty line.
In 2020, 35.3 percent of households with incomes below the Federal poverty line were food insecure. Food-insecure households include those with low food security and very low food security. Rates of food insecurity were substantially higher than the national average for single-parent households, and for Black and Hispanic households. Food insecurity was more common in both large cities and rural areas than in suburban areas.
Parents often shield children from experiencing food insecurity, particularly very lo
w food security, even when the parents themselves are food insecure. In 2020, 14.8 percent of households with children were food insecure. In about half of those food-insecure households with children, only the adults experienced food insecurity. But in 7.6 percent of households with children, both children and adults were food insecure sometime during the year. In 0.8 percent of U.S. households with children (322,000 households), both children and adults experienced instances of very low food security.
Food insecurity rates differ across States due to both the characteristics of their populations and to State-level policies and economic conditions. The estimated prevalence of food insecurity during 2018–20 ranged from 5.7 percent in New Hampshire to 15.3 percent in Mississippi (data for 2018–20 were combined to provide more reliable statistics at the State level).
As this issue of the Communique’ leaves the printing press to make its way to thousands of ECW members around the world, our prayers turn to the erupting conflict in Eastern Europe. How will the millions of refugees impact food production and consumption in the coming years? — Editor
* Data Courtesy of the Economic Research Service of the U.S. Department of Agriculture
